The Hitnan: A Tale of Blood and Canes by Wez Wallie

Author:Wez Wallie [Wallie, Wez]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2021-05-02T22:00:00+00:00

"IDON'TKNOWWHATIDID,BUTAMGLADIPLEASEDYE,MSWALKER"

"Balls did you win," spat Tilda in incensed fury. "YOU didn't kill the mark, he did, and by a total dumb luck accident too."

"The Lord works in mysterious ways. But usually fun ways, and in ways that benefit me! Gawd, I'm so hyped up I fink I need to do a Dotty's Diary update - no facker's gonna believe this!"

"nawmswalker,disisasupersecretjobbie!"

"Come on, Peter, let’s go tell Bognor the good news."

Tilda stood by the tub fuming. "Damn you, Dorothy Walker! Damn you to hell!"

"iseverytingok,mswalker?didyegetdatplayboyguynow?"

"Yep," said Dotty, cutting the canopy cords and letting his legs flop down onto the edge of the tub. "We got him good!"

Peader lifted his face out of the nice lady's plonkers, which had now left a caricatured impression of his mug within the malleable gel of the silicon.

"Wowzers," he said, slurping up the waterfall of dribble leaking from his mouth, after spending hours buried in boob and wondering why he hadn't topped himself years ago. "As near deat' experiences go, Ms Walker, dis is right up dere wit de best of 'em! I can't wait ta go back to de Lord, like!"

"Yeah, well let's wait a few years until we complete all our contracts, eh?" she said, sharing her post-jobbie Twix and walking him back to the front of the compound, amid his plastic-fumed delirium.

Tilda Matthews just stood in place, arm-crossed and sulking. She heard their voices rescind as they descended the hill. "D'ye tink Miss Mal will be upset dat I accidentally cheated on her at all?"

"I 'ardly fink that counts, Petey-boy. You're still a virgin too, my friend."

Tilda watched up through the open skylight as the stolen Chopper flew off back to London above her.

"You just wait, Dorothy Walker. I'll get you for this!"

Tilda dropped her wand into the tub and the three bodies frazzled and went up in flames.

She pocketed her goggles and picked up her beret, sticking it back on her head with a snarl.

"No witnesses. No loose ends."

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